Sleep Consultations

Sleep consults: FAQ

First, we gather information about your baby or child’s sleep routines and schedules. We want to understand where you’re coming from and what your baby’s sleep history has been. Next, we ask for your goals and desires for your family’s sleep. This may be more nighttime sleep, an earlier bedtime, your baby learning to self-soothe and fall asleep without your help, transitioning baby to her own room, learning to nap in the crib, eliminating night feedings, or some combination of these goals. Based on your goals, we create a customized plan for you. This plan often includes handing over the role of self-soothing and falling asleep to your capable baby, helping your baby wake up at night less frequently or getting rid of night wakings, weaning from night feedings, helping your baby or toddler learn to nap in her crib, and more.

With our 90-minute consults, there is a 2 week follow up period. You can email us with a handful of questions as they arise during this 2 week period, and sometimes it’s easier to just talk on the phone to cover your questions (this phone call is normally about 10-15 min). Within reason, we are available for you by email during the 2 week period, and we try to respond within 24 hours (except if it’s the weekend, which may take a bit longer). We want you to feel confident in your sleep plan, and the power is in the details. 

The answer is often yes. Many babies do protest when you change a well-entrenched pattern, including the sleep patterns they’re used to. The more closely families follow our guidance, the less crying is involved. This is because the specifics of our sleep plans are very important. Following these details, to a tee, is the quickest road to success — and a plan you can feel good about. As psychotherapists with graduate training in attachment theory and relationships, years of clinical experience (and kids of our own) our methods are specifically designed to maintain your connection and response to your baby. 

It’s normal for young babies, 0-4 months, to not be developmentally capable yet of falling asleep independently and sleeping through the night. They still need your help and to feed during the night. During these early months, our consult would focus on strategies to help you gradually step back, a little at a time, so your baby can have space to practice her emerging, self-soothing abilities. We don’t let babies this age cry for more than one minute without a response from you, so that you can maintain a strong, nurtured bond. We would also help you with timing, routines and the room environment. All of this helps to set the stage for optimal sleep and prepare you and baby for the next step, the Sleep Wave, at 4-5 months if you need it.

Most babies who are 5 months and older don’t need to feed any more at night. They can get all their nutritional needs met during the day. At this age, or whenever you’re ready, we can help you very gradually and effectively wean night feeds if you wish, as part of your new sleep plan.

Babies, toddlers, preschoolers, big kids, and teens.

The Sleep Wave method is our main technique for establishing new sleep patterns — including self-soothing to sleep and sleeping through the night. It is designed to satisfy two critical needs of your baby, healthy sleep and secure attachment. We will help you understand how good, natural sleep and maintaining a strong, nurtured bond, both develop naturally and work together rather than in opposition. In our approach, your baby will definitely have big feelings and protest the new way of falling asleep, but will never wonder or worry about where you are. You will always respond in a frequent and predictable way, so your baby feels safe. 

Yes, we do! We will help you create a sleep plan for your twins or multiples using special strategies, while also taking into account their individual temperaments and sleep history. 

If your baby is at least 4-5 months old, our success rate is very high, which is not surprising, since, by this age, babies are very capable of self-soothing.  The reason we don’t guarantee success is that you play a big role. Carefully following all the nuanced details and maintaining consistency are key to your plan working. The exceptions are babies who have a medical issue that’s getting in the way. Check with your pediatrician if this may be the case for your baby. 

We will work with you to ensure as much consistency as possible, whether your baby is in daycare, with a nanny or cared for by a grandparent or other family member. Babies are good at adapting to differences, so if things are not exactly the same at daycare or with Grandma, it works out. It will still be important that your baby falls asleep independently.   

No, because we want you to feel confident to implement your sleep plan. This is important for a few reasons. One, your baby needs to feel the presence of a trusted caretaker, not a stranger. Two, we are going to teach you techniques and ways of thinking that we want you to adopt and use for the rest of your baby’s childhood. We don’t just do a “sleep training” program (we don’t even use the word sleep training, because sleep is natural), we impart methods and tools that will change the way your family thinks and behaves towards sleep for years to come.