Baby Sleep Regressions
Why do they happen, and what to do?
The 4 month cognitive surge / sleep regression
As frustrating as it can be, babies periodically will have times when they sleep – how shall we say – less well. Sometimes the reasons are clear and expected, like:
Sickness, discomfort, teething pain
Travel
A disrupted routine or sleep environment
And sometimes the reasons are not as obvious and might be more of a guess as to what’s going on. Like,
Developmental changes and new abilities (rolling, sitting, standing, cognitive surges…)
Testing and reestablishing trust in the family sleep routines
Confusion over the routines, expectations, and sleep associations
Even though bumpy baby sleep is to be expected, how you respond can make a big difference over time – either helping your baby weather a time-limited sleep struggle, or in some cases making the pattern more entrenched and long standing. Obviously, the goal is the former!
Your approach to a sleep regression depends on your baby’s age, so let’s talk about the little ones first.
Sleep regressions and 0-4 month old babies
Little babies’ sleep can be unpredictable. It improves and then regresses in fits and spurts: a few blessedly restful nights of long stretches, followed by a few nights of repeated wakings.
Around 3 to 4 months, many babies hit a rough patch; even those whose sleep had been steadily improving can start to wake up more frequently at this age. It’s frustrating and confusing for parents to find their 4 month old baby wide-eyed and ready to party at 3:00 a.m. You can’t imagine how many times we’ve heard, “He thinks he’s a newborn again!”
Why does the 3-4 months sleep regression happen?
The reason for the 3-4 month sleep regression is your baby’s rapidly developing brain (a silver lining!). The drowsiness of the newborn months has worn off and your baby is leaping to a level of consciousness that feels novel. They’re more aware and their brains are alert, even in the middle of the night.
In other words, you did nothing wrong. This backtracking in sleep is not your fault. The novelty of a higher level of awareness will wear off in 2 to 4 weeks, and in large part your goal is to survive this time. [We have a mini class dedicated to helping you through just this phase, because it’s unique].
How do I help my 4 month old sleep?
See if you can give your baby just a little space to practice self soothing. Practice putting her down awake, use the Soothing Ladder approach for night wakings, and watch your baby’s awake spans during the day (which should at this age be around 90 minutes). During this 3-4 month regression, you may find yourself climbing to the very top rung of your Soothing Ladder for a while. That’s normal and nothing to worry about. At this age and younger, we don’t recommend letting babies cry for more than one minute without a Soothing Ladder response from you.
The tricky part is that the same awareness that makes for bumpy nights may also make your baby distracted during daytime feedings. Now, your baby is not only alert but also hungry during the night; adding night feeds during this regression is common. To minimize this, move to a calm and low-stimulus area like a dark bedroom for daytime feedings whenever possible, to make sure your baby gets enough to eat during the day.
Once your baby is 5 months, you can effectively handle any sleep issues you’re still having (bedtime, night wakings, weaning, early rising, etc) with the Sleep Wave method. The goal at this 5-months-and-older point is to clearly and responsively hand over the role of independent sleep to your baby.
Sleep regressions in 0-4 month old babies are often temporary, but if they persist, talk to your doctor and rule out or address medical problems like reflux, ear infections, allergies, and colic.
Sleep regressions and 5-24 month old babies
All these expected (sickness, etc.) and more mysterious (developmental surges) happenings also affect older babies and toddlers. If your baby is sick or your toddler is having a nightmare, of course you’ll help them feel better. You’ll tend to them, but do your best not to regress too far and get right back to your independent sleep habits (using the Sleep Wave if you need it) once they’re feeling better.
A Sleep regression doesn’t equal A growth spurt
Parents often interpret sleep regressions as being caused by growth spurts, so they respond by adding feedings in the middle of the night. Adding feedings back in is almost never necessary. Remember, after about 5 months, most babies can get all of their nutritional needs met during the day. It’s natural to think the wakings are hunger related, but they aren’t likely to be, unless your baby has a medical reason to need more night calories.
when regressions tell you it’s time to reassess your sleep routines and habits
The more mysterious reasons for sleep regressions – the kind that make you scratch your head and wonder what the heck is going on – usually indicate it’s time to re-assess the bedtime routines and sleep associations for any confusing messages. Make sure your routine is developmentally appropriate for baby’s age (this is a big one we work with parents on!) and that you are confidently keeping your baby in charge of independent sleep. If you’ve already used the Sleep Wave, it’s a “keep it in your back pocket” approach, because you can pull it back out any time sleep gets off track. The good news is that the second, third, and fourth time, your child will recognize it much more quickly and soon relax, knowing that you are nearby and that the soothing part is up to her.
It’s normal for sleep to regress a bit sometimes, but don’t follow your baby off a sleep cliff. Babies are still capable. Sleep is still fixable. You can always get them back on track!
In case you missed it:
THE HAPPY SLEEPER Consultations
Tailored sleep help - just for you.
Have a question about your specific baby? Maybe you read the book or watched the class and you want to ask about your unique situation? Or you want us to walk you through the whole process, start to finish? We’ve got you!
Notes to help you navigate this phase with your baby, including sleep timing, routines, where baby sleeps and what they wear, and a review of the Soothing Ladder.